Weigh in and a Revelation

My weight this morning was  202.4!!! I couldn’t believe it.  I’m so close, I pray I’m to onederland by my trip next weekend.  That’s 2.6 lbs.  I’m going to focus more this week on my food and exercise.  I still haven’t added strength training, but I bought a kettle bell that I’m going to try this weekend.  I needed that emotional boost after the week I’ve had.

Now on to my revelation…Supposedly exercise makes you feel better. It allegedly releases endorphins, reduces stress, and puts you in a better mood. This has always been foreign to me. Once, only once, have I come close to the runner’s high everyone talks about. I’ve never been energized by a workout.  I’m always waiting for it to be over and then completely exhausted when it is.  The only thing that I’ve ever felt better about it is knowing that it’s over and I made it through.

But, this week, that’s changed. I’m depressed about the whole boy situation. The surprising thing that has helped has been walks after work.  The revelation came after my Monday 4 mile walk/jog.  I didn’t want to go.  I wanted to go home and drink an entire bottle of winewallow.  I went anyway and am SO glad I did.  Something changed during the walk.  When it was over, I felt great.  Thoughts of the boy didn’t result in me becoming a crumpled up, crying mess.  Everything seemed okay.  The same thing happened on my walks Tuesday (2+ miles) and Wednesday (about 2 miles).  I was in tears on the way to the park, but able to cope on the way home.  Emotional healing along with physical healing…who knew!!   

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~ by Mary Frances on April 22, 2010.

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